Tuesday, March 3, 2009

it's difficult not to be. . .

bitter, upset, and angry about things. i believe everyone is entitled to these feelings, but the question will be, "what are you gonna do with those emotions?" it took a long time until i was able to come to a good place for myself. i had to realize that i was my own sanctuary and couldn't look to the arms of a partner to solve everything or anything for me (or even a community for that matter). it takes more energy to be angry and upset than it does to do work out of love and peace.

a while ago, i posed a question, can you be militant with a heart? it's crazy when you think about what the heart can motivate people to do and say. i'm sure the folks who voted for prop 8 were doing it as an act of love to god and to society, we can say the same thing about those who voted no on prop 8. i think what gets lost is lost in translation. people's own interpretations of acts of love will contradict one another. but w/o the contradictions and the "problems" folks wouldn't have found meaning or a reason to act.

people say we're in a post racial time. racism no longer exists because people of color have succeeded in achieving the highest position in government. of course they choose to juxtapose this president with another person of color from the opposing side. so living in a post racial society allows for folks to dismiss the existence of institutional racism and the ongoing acts of racism. because of this post racial climate and the labeling of obama as a socialist, it seems as if all our problems are solved. if that's the case, then what does that mean for folks who are fighting for equity and social justice?

we will always need a reason to fight and to keep living. sometimes we just don't know any other way of living.

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What's the Master's Thesis?

Beneath Our Maria Claras reveal the lives of Filipinas as they attempt to undress layers of pre-colonial identities sewn by patterns of colonialism, imperialism, and patriarchy. For years, I have struggled to remove this garment and try to do what some colonized peoples have done, de-colonize myself and understand the social and historical conditions impacting my live. This blog/research follow my lines of thoughts and understanding while trying to understand: How do second generation Filipina American college students reclaim power that was denied to them culturally through gender?